I have had many relationships over the years. Some have been deep and meaningful, and have blossomed and grown into something beautiful. Others ended quickly in immediate disaster, pain, and agony. They gave me feelings of defeat and hopelessness, and have left a bitter taste in my mouth and a sinking feeling of failure in my gut. Those failed relationships made me feel as though I never wanted to open myself up to another human being again, as long as I live.
The longer I live, the more I realize the importance of being grateful for each of the many relationships I experienced in my life. I have grown to believe that each one was strategically placed at just the right and perfect time for me. Each relationship accomplished something great and worked some sort of miracle in my life at the exact moment that I needed a particular lesson. Each person I have ever encountered, have come across, or have had experiences with, has left me better off for having known them. I have gained something, learned something, remembered something, felt something, and experienced something great from all of them. It didn’t matter if their intentions, words, or actions were good or bad, creative or destructive. All of the experiences made me better in some way. They made me more experienced, wiser, more loving, more forgiving, more learned, and left me feeling more blessed. All of the things they did to me, were things that I eventually realized they did for me.
I received an important lesson from EVERY relationship I have had, which has then empowered me in my CURRENT love relationship to BE BETTER.
Some of the lessons I learned from all of my “failed” relationships that helped me MOST, to create BETTER relationships:
- NOBODY can or will “complete” you. You, ALL BY YOURSELF, are ALREADY complete and whole.
- How you see YOURSELF is how you will generally see others. The more you love yourself, the more you can love others.
- How you FEEL is of the utmost importance. The quality of the way you FEEL will dictate the quality of EVERYTHING else in your life, including how you interact with others, the decisions you make, and EVERY creation you participate in.
- When someone triggers you, in ANY way, it is about YOU, not them. YOUR opinion of yourself needs to be more important than the opinions OTHERS have of you.
- If you are faced with the decision to be RIGHT or to be KIND, ALWAYS choose to be kind.
- SELF CARE is NOT selfish-IT IS NECESSARY. We cannot lead others into the light by stepping into the darkness with them, just like we cannot continuously provide an overflow of abundance for others in ANY area of life without first filling ourselves up.
- DO THINGS, EVERY DAY, ALL DAY, THAT MAKE YOU FEEL GOOD, THAT LIGHT YOU UP, and THAT RE-ENERGIZE YOU. HOW WE FEEL is what determines the speed and quickness of what we create, attract, manifest, and project, FEEL GOOD ALL THE TIME.
- Strategically design each day to be able to only do what makes you FEEL GOOD ALL THE TIME, more and more.
I also realized that there was a common denominator in each of my “failed” relationships: ME.
I’m grateful for each person I have crossed paths with and for what I have learned, gained, and experienced, because of them all. The miracles in our lives are worked through other people, sometimes in the most unexpected and difficult ways to understand.
Today’s challenge for myself: Today I will ponder on the blessings, positivity, the good, and the benefits in my life because of my relationships with others in my past that help me create and contribute MORE to my CURRENT relationship. I will take the time express gratitude when and where it is appropriate to do so. I will remember that it is the relationship that I have with MYSELF that matters most, and I will talk to myself, treat myself, and perceive of myself, as someone I love and want to keep around. I Will remember: WE PROJECT ALL THAT WE BELIEVE WE ARE, AND BY SO DOING WE RENDER OUR REALITY.
THE BETTER WE KNOW, THE BETTER WE CAN DO. EVERYTHING is feedback. EVERYTHING is useful data-information we can use to upgrade our beliefs, opinions, meanings, definitions, perspectives, and habits. EVERYTHING is an opportunity for experiential learning through interaction, and to use what we learn to UPGRADE SKILLS in order to CONSTANTLY become BETTER CREATORS.
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Remember: Mindset matters. Character counts. That which we choose to consistently focus on is what EXPANDS in our lives. WE CREATE our personal realities.