May 10: Definitions and Meanings

I’ve heard that 10% of life is what happens to us, and 90% of life is how we choose to react or respond.  The main thing that determines how we react, respond, and ultimately how effective we are as human beings, are the things we DEFINE OURSELVES by, and the meanings we attach to everything going on around us.  Our perspectives MATTER.

Our SELF IMAGE directly correlates to the quality of choices we make and the personal reality we constantly RE-create.  When we consistently UPGRADE OUR SELF IMAGE, and the meanings we attach to ALL things, we then automatically upgrade our personal reality.

The quality of our reactions is directly related to the quality of our thinking, beliefs, perceptions, and definitions.  The quality of our thinking, beliefs, perceptions, and definitions DETERMINES THE QUALITY OF OUR LIVES.

When we “fail,” go through difficult times, experience rejection, perform poorly at work or in life, or experience negativity, stress, anxiety, or drama, we have some choices to make.  How will we define the interaction and the way we participated within the interaction?  How will we define ourselves after going through these experiences?  Will we choose to give up?   Will we take a pause and decide HOW to think about it all?  Will we use these experiences as fuel to a fire that we choose to have burning within us that motivates us to keep trying, work harder, remain relentless, and push ourselves even more?  Will a severe over-reaction on our part put us in a self-destructive, self-loathing cycle, and ruin an entire day or evening? Will we choose to daily review what we are proud of, and why we appreciate our self for something in particular we did each day, then revisit something that happened each day that we want to improve on, and visualize saying, doing, or reacting in a more optimal way?

What is OUR truth after a “failure?”  Does it mean we suck, that we are stupid, or that we will probably fail at everything else in life, so why even try?  Does it simply mean we are inexperienced, lacking knowledge, wisdom, and skills, and need to keep upgrading, trying, practicing, and repeating what is needed, until we finally succeed, according to OUR OWN definition of success?

The word YET is a useful tool.  “I am not good at that” is COMPLETELY different from “I am not good at that YET.”

Jack Canfield is one of my favorite mentors to learn from.  He created a formula to live by:

E + R = O

Simply type his name and this formula into the YouTube search engine to learn more about this formula.

WE get to choose the definitions and meanings in this life for OURSELVES.  We no longer have to dictate the outcomes and results in our lives by the rules, definitions, and meanings we may have been originally programmed with, forced to live by, taught, or coerced into, by loving, well-meaning caretakers who raised us the best they could, but may have been inexperienced or limited in their thinking and perspectives at that time in THEIR lives.  WE get to decide what comes NEXT!

That inner voice and all of the self-talk we have been programmed with from the beginning plays a role in coming up with the definitions and meanings we currently have of ourselves and ALL things.  WE CAN UPGRADE THE INNER VOICE AND ALL OF THE SELF-TALK!  It is so important that we choose to be self-aware.  The more aware we become, the better choices we can make.  The better we know, the better we do.

It’s useful to HABITUALLY choose optimism over pessimism, especially when we are recreating WHO WE ARE, or our SELF IMAGE, and what we stand for.  Whether we realize it, or not, this is a daily process that will last the rest of our lives.  This life is a practice.

This world is a PROVING GROUNDS, in which we practice what we learn until we MASTER it, and prove just how well we are learning our lessons, THROUGH OUR CREATIONS.  Our self-recreation is a daily, continuous process.  Self-optimization and upgrades in EVERY area of our lives is an ongoing opportunity, IF WE CHOOSE IT.

What are some things you have endured, failed at, or that have caused you pain?  Did you choose to let these things define you?  What meanings did you attach to these experiences?  Were they character-building?  Did they destroy you, shatter you, break you, bring you to your knees, and make you give up?  Did you allow these situations to build you up into a stronger, wiser, better version of yourself?  Did you choose to become a victim and wait for someone to help you, save you, or rescue you, or did you choose to learn how to practice saving yourself?

I’ve played the role of a victim.  I’ve allowed past failures to define me, making me feel hopeless, irreparable, and shattered.  It took me years of pain, unintentional self-inflicted trauma, and lots of “failures,” before I decided to make a few simple, consistent improvements in my belief system.  Once I learned how to THINK better, and REPROGRAM MYSELF and my subconscious, I started to improve.  After I began to choose to habitually improve, my life experiences improved.

It was easy to change.  Of course, it was incredibly difficult, new, and uncomfortable, at first, but looking back, it was actually easy, and definitely worth it.  If I was able to do it, ANYONE CAN.

It was the goodinthehead Beliefs Project which sparked this change and empowered me to completely change my reality, forever.

To learn more about it, google The goodinthehead Beliefs Project, or go to and select the menu.  You’ll find it there.

the book, PSYCHO-CYBERNETICS is a MUST READ for ANYONE looking to upgrade their own self image and the results of their human existence.

The definitions and meanings which we attach our feelings to, THROUGH our beliefs, matter a great deal.  Our beliefs will determine HOW WE FEEL, every day, for the rest of our lives.  HOW WE FEEL is HOW WE CREATE.  Our feelings are vibrations which magnetically transmit and receive similar vibrations through EVERY CELL IN OUR BODIES.

We may as well create a beneficial system, stack the odds in our favor, and set ourselves up to win!

Today’s challenge for myself:  Today, I will think about the definitions and meanings I attach to ALL of the experiences in my life, how I choose to react to them, and how I let them define me.

I will take the time to start my OWN version of The goodinthehead Beliefs Project.


goodinthehead is also on Facebook, Instagram, YouTube, and Twitter.  The goodinthehead Podcast can be found on YouTube.  Follow me there, as well, for daily messages, inspiration, motivation, and reminders.  Please pay it forward, and share this, and ANY message, which may empower someone you love or may care about.  It is through adding value to others by sharing and spreading wisdom, that we become more valuable as individuals, and collectively, as a whole, we all become wiser.

Remember:  Mindset matters.  Character counts.  That which we choose to consistently focus on is what EXPANDS in our lives.  WE CREATE our personal realities.

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